My Midlife Crisis Has A Midlife Crisis II

 

I was having a drink with some people, after a play. I was minding my own business, when the topic changed. It's the unavoidable Men vs Women.

So, the  opinionated brunette drew first blood. 

"Men. What the fuck do you want?"

I frown and cringe thee.

"Seriously, like totally. Like wow and stuff"

"We men want peace and quiet, love and affection. We want it just as much we are ready to give back. We want to be able to trust. We want to be compatible with our partner. We don't want needless drama. A mix of lusty and loyal."

She  looked at me like I'm behind on child support or something , and started ranting on insecure men, objectification, patriarchy, sexualization, and some other big words she read on instagram.

" I rephrase. These days I value a baseline of sanity. I just want someone to be compatible with my stupidity and madness. Is that too much to ask for?

The conversation went downhill from there, so i deciced to nuke the place and leave.

"Don't try to understand women. Women understand women, that's why they hate each other."

That last look in her eyes, was colder than dying in the North Pole, the coldest day of winter. The city was mumbling, its' Friday night. Started to rain, the streets were like opaque mirrors.

What men want, what women want.. Who the fuck knows? What is happiness anyway? Nothing but a memory? Happiness is making love in the morning. Taking walks. Making a joke out of everything. Talking about everything and nothing at 04:00. Sharing something. Buying something stupid and useless just for the pleasure of it. Sharing your darkest fears and wildest dreams. Planning for the future. Eating chocolate and junk food. Watching the same films. 

Sometimes i pray for god to take away my ability to read. Please Lord, let us live in the bliss of ignorance and cherish our limited time on this wretched planet. Just want someone  who doesn't expect me to be their personal psychological punching bag and simultaneously their psychologist. I'm already my own psychological punching bag and psychologist, cut me some slack.

Another wasted night, that sums up well why the end of times are needed.