I'm going to be late. Where's my black shirt? Ok, all my shirts (and t-shirts) are black, but I need THAT black shirt. I need a haircut. And those eye bags... Why am I so nervous? Maybe because is my first date since aeons. Where is my phone? My keys?
It's awfully quiet for a Saturday, the streets are empty, the metro station is empty, nobody around. WTF, did I miss something? I'm already late. Where is a cab when you need one? I'm walking all sweaty and stressed, and then it hits me. I take a step back and look around. There's no one. No cars, no people, not even strays. Ok, this isn't funny. I call my mother, she doesn't answer. Neither my friends or my date. I'm walking terrified.
I've had hangovers before, but this is ridiculously scary. Am I dead? Is this hell? Or am I the only survivor? Please Lord no, all the films and tv shows with this premise are all boring. I spot a car running. I got in and drove to the bar. Not a living soul. I call every number on my phone, no one answers. Whatever, I at least I wasn't late. Three drinks later, I feel more confused. No signal, the internet is down.
What is happening? Am I dreaming? Am I in a coma? Is this a test, a simulation, some kind of a VR beta test? And why I'm not hearing boss music? As if reality wasn't fabricated and Tiktoksexual enough... I need some music. Not that. This one is better. Half a bottle later, my options are still shitty. Suicide? Nah, too selfish for that. Try to find what happened? Too lazy. So what? I don't know man, I'll take all the booze and chocolates I can carry, head back home and drink my self to oblivion.
The phone rings. I haven't seen that number for a long time. That sigh... The G-spot between awkward and sexy. She's scared, I try to calm her. She's waiting at the square we used to meet. It's almost embarrassing, almost three years later. The break up was brutal, the recovery even worse. The intimacy is always there, trapped in the ice of the time unshared. Will the ice melt? Will it be still alive? Do my hair look good? I know her every move, gesture, and pause, what shines behind every glance.
She hugs me tight. The smell of her hair makes even the end of the world feel like vacation.
A shy kiss later and not one day have passed since we were together. We talk. Most of the time, I don't listen to what she's saying. I'm just devouring every detail of her. The conversation leads to the same dead ends.
"I never felt that you were mine, only when we made love. And we can't make love all the time."
"Says who?"
"You never change, do you?"
"If change means boring, than no."
She smirks. I pull her closer and kiss her. She's nervous.
"Is it possible, that we are the last two people in the world?"
"I don't know."
"What if is it true?"
"Well, maybe that's the only way we can be together."
Existencial crisis loading. With a twist of panic attack. I know that look. The road is gonna get bumpy.
"Why did you leave me?"
"I didn't leave you, you run away."
"You made me!"
"Let's not play with words. Again."
She stands up.
"Why are you here? Because I'm the last person in the world or is it because you wantd to see me?"
I reach for her hands. She sits on my lap.
"Every white hair on me has your name."
"What about your heart?"
"You kicked it so hard in the balls when you left, that had sex reassignment!"
"You don't take anything seriously, everything is a joke to you!"
"I wasn't trying to be funny."
"You are a teenager trapped in the body of a middle-aged man!"
"More like a middle aged man trapped in the body of a teenager"
"An out of shape one..."
"Touché."
"What do you want?"
And right before I poured my heart and soul, the phone rings. Of course it was a dream. It's my date. I stood her up. She's furious. I get up and make some coffee. The world is still there. Maybe that dream was a sign. Or just an excuse use to see her. I get dressed and off I go to another disappointment. She's surprised to see me.
"What are you doing here?"
"I know that is going to sound weird, but I have to get it out of my system. If the world was going to end tonight, you are the only person that I'd like to be with!"
She's confused.
"Funny, I had a dream last night. Something like that."
She had the same dream. We talk, we fight.
"I'm dating someone."
"Spare me the vague ambiguity!"
"You don't get it, do you? I' m seeing someone else!"
"If he was important, you wouldn't be here!"
"I'm not supposed to be here, we have a date and you are making me late!"
"We are having a serious conversation!"
"We are fighting about a stupid dream!"
"A dream with both saw? Doesn't this mean anything to you?"
"It's strange... I don't know. Probably a coincidence. I have to go."
I stand in her way.
"It's not a coincidence."
"Ok it's not. And then what? We'll keep fighting, until you grab me and kiss me?"
I grab her and kiss her. That was a long kiss. A cinematic one. Her phone rings.
"Tell him to go fuck himself"
"If the world ended, I would also like to be with you."
I smile.
"What if all this is just a bad remake or a sequel?"
"It's not."
"Ok. And if it's a flop anyway?"
"Did you enjoyed Babylon?"
"Every second of it."
"It was a huge flop."
"Your point?"
"Even if it is a flop, we'll have the time of our lives."
"I'd like it if you were more specific."
"I'd like it if you were less dresssed."
He beauty can't explain the world away. But it's the best question left unanswered.
Ok, I have to be honest. There was never a dream. My heart needed confort food, so I watched two of my favourite 80s films. I hope my parallel universe selves are happier than me... Did anything of the above actyally happened? Maybe, maybe not. Never trust a writer, especially on a lonely Saturday night. Is there anything true? Does it matter? The dream is always the same.
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